You are a little bored with traditional sex; you wanted something new, “sharp”. And if you have not tried anal penetration, then this is the first thing you should pay attention to. Do not be afraid of their desires, and when the thought of anal sex appeared in the head, then you just need to correctly offer it to your partner. Perhaps he, too, has long dreamed of penetrating your delicious ass or substituting his own. And if you, knowing your partner, are afraid of misunderstanding and refusal, then everything can be solved by correct conversation and preparation.
It is very important to remember that you should not make an offer to have anal sex unexpectedly. For example: “Hello, dear. Look, what kind of butt plug I bought you. Today we will print your ass!”
From such a surprise, an unprepared man at best twitches an eye, at worst – he will run away from home. Of course, many people have tried anal sex, others have heard a lot and even seen in porn, but did not dare to include anal play in their intimate repertoire.
But it also happens that a person did not think about it or got a negative experience, and perhaps experienced discomfort, pain, injury. The trauma could be not only physical, but also psychological – when a partner exerts strong pressure or simply leads to anal play. Therefore, Experts recommend holding a preliminary conversation if you do not want this fantasy to burst like a soap bubble.
The best time to talk is when you are not having sex, excess erotic energy and excitement will be a hindrance. You need to find out simple things: did your partner have anal sex experience, and did he ever want to. There are some good ways to start a conversation. For example, to say something like:
“I read an article on the Internet about anal sex, it even became interesting to try. And how do you feel about this?”
“I once tried anal sex, I liked it, did you try it? I would love to experience this pleasure with you.”
“I fantasized about anal sex and now I dream to do it with you!”
These are neutral phrases that do not create a feeling of pressure on the partner, but merely voice the desire that has arisen. It is necessary to act gradually. We start the game with a minimum “bet” – a finger in the ass and as the mutual desire arises, we increase it more and more. If everything is done correctly, the jackpot is waiting for you a fascinating, breathtaking, naughty anal game.
Give time to think
If your partner at the first stage of the conversation did not express enthusiastic consent, this is no reason to retreat. Do not insist and do not press on the partner, in any case do not be offended. Just say that you give time to think and you will wait for a decision. Do not try to accidentally start the anal game when having sex. From time to time, go back to this question. After all, to bring anal sex pleasure, it is necessary that both partners want this and be as relaxed as possible.
Study this topic together
One of the most common reasons why anal is considered morally inconvenient and physically painful is the lack of knowledge of how to do things right. Suggest reading together articles on this topic. Show online resources with useful information; check out the assortment of sex toys for beginners.
Give your partner confidence that you are studying the topic and are serious about this issue, and he will trust you more, which means you can relax more. Inspire him, finally, with your fantasy, let her become his fantasy too. A woman can be told about the ancient Indian practices of stimulation of the anus, a man – about the benefits of prostate massage. Disassemble an interesting topic of games in public places using Bluetooth anal gadgets or remote control.
You can try offering to the “host” one to get acquainted with solo gadgets – for this there are anal balls Christmas trees, small traffic jams. Let him first independently examine his body in order to understand his sensations and readiness to find something more dimensional in his anus.
Heard no in response
You can be very upset by the negative decision of your partner. This feeling is completely understandable, and it is important not to let it hurt your relationship. If a loved one did not want to try anal sex, do everything possible not to put pressure on him, do not immediately try to convince him to change his mind. Most likely, it will cause a deep denial of this type of sex, which will worsen the situation. The best thing to do is to say “thank you” for listening and answering honestly.
If the relationship is trusting, try to figure out what the problem is. And if you find a “point of reference”, then you can do something with it together. You may face some question like do men have better orgasm with butt plug? Always give a positive answer so that your partner can be confident.
For example, if a partner says that he tried anal sex and it was painful, say that you can limit yourself to external touches to begin with, without penetration. Or you can tell about anal lubricants and sprays with analgesic effect, modern anal lubricants and means that relax the muscles of the anus.
If your partner is concerned about hygiene, take care of enemas, vinyl sheets and proper preparation for anal sex. Tell that everything has been thought out for you, and there is a special hygienic shower. Solving partner’s problems will be much easier if you don’t put pressure on him and insist on short-term agreement.
Of course, not in all cases it will work. There are people with tough taboos on everything related to anal sex. And the best thing to do is take it and look for other ways to enjoy sex together. Remember – there are many options to make love, and anal – only one of them.
“Yes”. Anal sex be
First you need to make sure that “yes” means exactly that “I definitely want to do it”, and not “I don’t really want to, but I’ll do it for you.” In the second case, the likelihood of an unpleasant experience increases, the anal play “will not work”, the partner will lose the opportunity to enjoy this kind of sex. The body will respond to your caresses only if it is “oh, yes!”
Hearing a firm agreement on the anal game, you need to clarify a few more points. Try to get answers to the following questions:
- “If you had an anal sex experience, tell me what you liked and what you didn’t!”
- Are you interested in trying an anal sex toy, for example, cork for beginners? Have you ever experimented with anal plugs? “
- Now you have certain knowledge in this matter, what would you like to start with, what was most interesting for you?”
- “What exactly should I not do during anal play?”
- “Do you feel awkward, or are you anxious about anal sex?”
These questions will give you useful information about the wishes of your partner. For example, if the anal game does not catch, does not excite him, because there is a moral “taboo” – this greatly hinders the enjoyment of sensations, the body will not be responsive and pliable.
Feel free to tell more about why you want to have anal sex, describe the feelings and emotions that you want to experience with your loved one. The more such conversations there are, the greater the likelihood that you can bring pleasure to your partner and make him want it again and again.